SueTube – Let’s talk TV with critic Susan Young

Since this is a pilot project, there’s bound to be a few glitches. No. 1 is that the comments aren’t posting to the right anymore, so I’m going to just start posting them inside this blog item.
And sorry about outing you Candace….

CANDACE:
Oh. My. God. Sue, you have outed me. That was a PRIVATE conversation!!!

Well, it is fascinating what with all the action on BB8 ending for the most part on Thursday, and this father/daughter duo having to stay in the house, with absolutely nothing to do, until Tuesday. They’re earning their money, these two. And honestly, can’t BB up the prize money? After taxes, the winner doesn’t get much. You couldn’t assure me of a win and coop me up in this house, with these people, and as a capper, have me spend five days alongside a pouty daughter who’s a poor sport unless she wins, and then she’s magnaminous and tells people she loves them.

Not like I watch the show closely or anything.

Sadly, though, Evel Dick has slowly descended into insanity today, taking his boredom and frustration out on first the washer that appeared to not be working, and then giving up and hosing down the backyard for no apparent reason. He later moved to a long soak in the hot tub with a Marlboro Red, every once in a while chuckling to himself. Which was rather creepy. Then he got out of the hot tub, sat down on in the backyard and screamed, “WHAT WAS THE SCORE OF THE JETS GAME?” He went on to rant that the first they he wanted to do when he got out was to sit down with a (expletive) newspaper. Good news for those of us in this business. Through it all, Dani has slept – apparently pouting from a bad night last night when the pair got questions from the jury, and Dani, thinking her dad is going to win, supposedly accused him of campaiging against her (his daughter, mind you) and then pouted in bed. She has amazing fortitude.

But really, I’m only casually watching this stuff. I swear.

Oh wait! Dani is up and about! Must return to the live feed….

With the Emmy’s going on tonight, there’s not much going on at the Big Brother house.

Or is there?

Candace Murphy’s watching the live feed and talks about what’s going on. Also, for those who want to fill in the blanks, “Big Brother” offers a recap show tonight. What were your favorite moments from the show?

In the meantime, here’s the column I wrote about visiting the Big Brother house in July:

THERE HE WAS, just a few feet away from me, singing and dancing around the room all by himself while he busily packed his bag in anticipation of moving.
As I edged closer to the two-way mirror, the tattooed rocker turned to check himself out in the mirror and suddenly I was nose-to-nose with Evel Dick.

Spooky.

Watching CBS’ “Big Brother” is one of the guiltiest of pleasures, but actually going into the “Big Brother” house to lurk along the “camera cross” that weaves around the domicile and enables the cameras to keep close tabs on the inhabitants is, well, mesmerizing.

And makes you feel just a little bit sooty.

This is the eighth season of the reality show, which began with modest ratings in July before picking up steam in the last few weeks.

In a summer that has shown weak ratings all around the remote, “Big Brother” has actually started to show some life, with ratings in the all-important 18-49 demo up 33 percent this week. The show’s finale will air on Sept. 18.

In addition to the broadcast show, the premium cable/satellite network Showtime Too offers nightly live coverage from 9 to midnight. That feed is edited only for slanderous statements, and, for cost considerations, music that Dick or someone else might hum.

Do you have any idea what they get for a few bars of “Happy Birthday to You”? Well, that’s another column.

A few weeks ago, “Big Brother” producer Allison Grodner took five TV critics on a grand tour of the “Big Brother” house. We wore black so that the housemates couldn’t see us behind the mirrors. The house is located on the CBS lot, and it’s not so much a house as a warehouse.
Inside, some bleary-eyed editors keep tabs on a bank of monitors 24/7. They mark the most interesting story trends, which they weave together for the thrice-weekly telecasts. Although the editors say they don’t have favorites, they obviously appreciate people like Dick, who is always offering some fireworks, and crazy Jen, the Hollywood nanny who’s crazier than an inbred Chihuahua.

The reality show, in which reality plays a very small role, follows the housemates around, recording their every move — and that includes a potty cam that Grodner assures has such poor quality you really can’t get any detailed shots.

In our peek around the place, there was a narrow escape from seeing one resident emerge from his shower.

The roommates are given surreal “tests” that range from Queen of Hearts croquet to hanging upside down on pendulums. The group also must earn its food in contests and can be reduced to eating something known as “slop.”

So, of course, we asked Grodner if her team could whip up a little slop for us to taste. It’s not really all that bad, especially if you grew up with a mom who couldn’t quite make a proper bowl of oatmeal. The unflavored multigrain hot mash might not be too bad with a dollop of brown sugar and a dash of cinnamon.

Grodner says her team literally lives in the building, devoting its entire life to the show while it’s on the air. The team eats, breathes and lives the experience, which is not unlike monitoring zoo animals.

This year’s theme for the house is “Alice in Wonderland,” so the props have kind of a whimsical feel about them. Inside the house, there are doors so small you have to stoop to go through them, big and small beds that look like you just entered the home of the Three Bears and a giant tea cup in the yard where the people can just hang out.

The only place the housemates can see real sunlight is in the yard, where the roof has been cut out of the warehouse. There’s a little pool and other toys for them.

As we walked around the narrow dark hall, which looked and smelled like a Halloween haunted house, we peered in to see Jen snoozing at 6 at night. It was like waiting for the bear to wake up at the zoo. You almost wanted to tap on the glass to see what would happen.

The “front” of the house, where the evicted guests go to be interviewed by Julie Chen, has mock stained glass, faux topiary and statues.

“I get the hot sheets every day, where someone logs the hot quotes, the headlines of what happens. It’s like a soap opera,” Chen says. “On Wednesdays, we go over everything and see what questions we want to ask (after the eviction).”

Chen calls the show “performance art,” which is as close as you can get to describing what happens in the house. Each person is consciously putting on a show for the audience — and for their fellow housemates.

This season, the twists included putting in Eric as “America’s Player,” which means he gets instructions from people logging onto the Web site suggesting he do certain things, such as give Jessica the silent treatment, or to make sure a certain person (Dustin, for instance) gets put up for eviction. The other twist was having three couples in the house who were once close and are now on the outs. One pair was Dick, at 44 the oldest resident, and his estranged daughter Daniele, 20.

“I want to see Dick stay in the house because of the relationship with his daughter,” Chen says. “And Jen is just fun to watch. I would like to hang out with her because she’s just fun and I would be very disappointed if Jen was voted out.”

I’ll be blogging the Emmys live right here, and we’re talking really live, starting at about 5 p.m. on the West Coast and 8 p.m. for the rest of you, since the West Coast event is tape-delayed for us. Come and join in the commenting. We’ll mock at will.

So here’s a quick list of the major categories, with our choice for who should win. And we’re not hedging with that silly who-will-win, who-should-win, who-could-win stuff that allows you to have three chances to get it right.

Lead Actress

in a Comedy Series

Felicity Huffman, “Desperate Housewives”

Julia Louis-Dreyfus, “The New Adventures of Old Christine”

Tina Fey, “30 Rock”

America Ferrera, “Ugly Betty”

Mary-Louise Parker, “Weeds”

Great field, but Parker lit up the screen this season.

Lead Actress

in a Drama Series

Sally Field, “Brothers & Sisters”

Kyra Sedgwick, “The Closer”

Mariska Hargitay, “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit”

Patricia Arquette, “Medium”

Minnie Driver, “The Riches”

Edie Falco, “The Sopranos”

They’re all winners in our book, but this is Falco’s year.

Lead Actor

in a Comedy Series

Ricky Gervais, “Extras”

Tony Shalhoub, “Monk”

Steve Carell, “The Office”

Alec Baldwin, “30 Rock”

Charlie Sheen, “Two and a Half Men”

Love them all, but have to go with Alec Baldwin.

Lead Actor

in a Drama Series

James Spader, “Boston Legal”

Hugh Laurie, “House”

Denis Leary, “Rescue Me”

James Gandolfini, “The Sopranos”

Kiefer Sutherland, “24”

Anyone other than Gandolfini? Fuggedaboutit.

Supporting Actress

in a Comedy Series

Jaime Pressly, “My Name is Earl”

Jenna Fischer, “The Office”

Holland Taylor, “Two and a Half Men”

Conchata Ferrell, “Two and a Half Men”

Vanessa Williams, “Ugly Betty”

Elizabeth Perkins, “Weeds”

We’ve got to go with Perkins, although Taylor and Ferrell are our sentimental favorites.

Supporting Actress

in a Drama Series

Rachel Griffiths, “Brothers & Sisters”

Katherine Heigl, “Grey’s Anatomy”

Chandra Wilson, “Grey’s Anatomy”

Sandra Oh, “Grey’s Anatomy”

Aida Turturro, “The Sopranos”

Lorraine Bracco, “The Sopranos”

All strong performances, but Wilson stands out.

Supporting Actor

in a Comedy Series

Kevin Dillon, “Entourage”

Jeremy Piven, “Entourage”

Neil Patrick Harris, “How I Met Your Mother”

Rainn Wilson, “The Office”

Jon Cryer, “Two and a Half Men”

You’ve got to go with Wilson, if only for the bat episode.

Supporting Actor

in a Drama Series

William Shatner, “Boston Legal”

T.R. Knight, “Grey’s Anatomy”

Masi Oka, “Heroes”

Michael Emerson, “Lost”

Terry O’Quinn, “Lost”

Michael Imperioli, “The Sopranos”

Oka was the break-out star of the year, but Imperioli did some of his best work this season and deserves the Emmy.

Outstanding Comedy

“Entourage”

“The Office”

“30 Rock”

“Two and a Half Men”

“Ugly Betty”

No contest: “The Office.”

Outstanding Drama

“Boston Legal”

“Grey’s Anatomy”

“Heroes”

“House”

“The Sopranos”

C’mon. “The Sopranos.”

Only four vodcasts under our belt and I think we’re getting better.

I’ve been using writers at the paper for the first three, then a guinea pig, er, friend, agreed to be the beta for our first civilian interview.

Thanks Angie, who is a sophomore at Monte Vista High School in Danville, for helping out. You did a great job. Chick Chat video

Comments? Offers to volunteer to be on the show? C’mon down.

You can read the review of “Gossip Girl” on the TV page

Taylor Madison may only be 7, but she’s already in an Emmy nominated commercial.

The Livermore second-grader scored big time when she was cast in the snazzy Pepsi Pinball commercial, one of the best we’ve seen. If you haven’t checked it out, a young guy steps out of a store and gets smacked by a giant pinball and begins careening down San Francisco city streets and parking garages.

About 10 seconds into the commerical you see Taylor give him the stink eye as he whizzes past the car she’s riding in.

The awards were handed out last Saturday and Pepsi lost out to Ellen Degeneres’ American Express ad with all those cute critters. We still think Pepsi should have scored a win with this innovative commerical.

Want to know who’s who when your CBS shows come back this month? We also discover that there is life after “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” for one actor.

Here’s a quick rundown from the network:

CRIMINAL MINDS Wednesdays, 9:00-10:00 PM, ET/PT

Emmy Award nominee JOE MANTEGNA will join the cast of CRIMINAL MINDS starring as FBI Special Agent David Rossi, an original member of the Behavioral Analysis Unit who took early retirement to go on lecture and book tours, and has volunteered to return to the unit.

Mantegna is scheduled to make his first appearance in the sixth episode of the season.

“We are all THRILLED to have Joe Mantegna joining our family. He’s an incredible actor, a genuinely nice person and, as a fellow Chicagoan, I can tell you he makes fantastic Italian Beef sandwiches and Chicago Style Hot Dogs,” said Executive Producer Ed Bernero.

And the reliable actor isn’t likely to skip out on the show like Mandy Patinkin.

CSI: NY Wednesdays, 10:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT

A.J. BUCKLEY will become a series regular after recurring for two seasons as Adam Ross, a CSI Tech guru out of Seattle. Specializing in Computer Forensics, Ross is the go-to scientist for the latest technological applications needed to solve crimes in Manhattan.

“He was hired by Mac Taylor to stay ‘one step ahead’ of the criminals in New York City, who often use more complicated technology than the average crime lab in the country. Therefore, Ross is the X-factor in crime solving and necessary ‘ringer’ to fight the most complex and sophisticated crimes,” said Anthony E. Zuiker, Creator and Executive Producer of the CSI Franchise.

GHOST WHISPERER Fridays, 8:00-9:00 PM, ET/PT

JAY MOHR will become a series regular, playing Professor Payne who provides an encyclopedic knowledge of the spirit world, as well as genuine concern for Melinda’s (Jennifer Love Hewitt) safety as she puts herself in ever greater danger to protect those she cares about — even though he hides his concern behind an ever-present irreverent sense of humor.

“We’re thrilled to have Jay as a series regular this year. He’s a terrific actor who is fun to work with for the same reasons he’s fun to watch: he brings humor, energy, creativity and spontaneity to the set and to his role. He also brings sports commentary and sometimes donuts,” says Executive Producer P.K. Simonds.

SHARK Sundays, 10:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT

KEVIN ALEJANDRO joins the cast as Sebastian’s (James Woods) newest team member Danny Reyes, an edgy and aggressive young deputy district attorney who earned his stripes in the Organized Crime Unit.

“Kevin Alejandro is an incredibly dynamic and intelligent actor who brings great energy and attitude to the legal team,” says Executive Producer/Creator Ian Biederman. “Danny plays by his own rules — which both endears him to Sebastian and creates great conflict.”

NEW RECURRING CAST MEMBERS:

SHARK Sundays, 10:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT

KEVIN POLLAK joins the series in the recurring role of brash and cunning newly elected District Attorney Leo Cutler.

“Kevin Pollak is a superb actor who infuses the role of Leo Cutler with wit and a moral ambiguity that is a perfect fit for the show. Leo’s an outstanding foil for Sebastian and the team,” says Executive Producer/Creator Ian Biederman.

WITHOUT A TRACE Thursdays, 10:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT

Golden Globe nominee HENRY THOMAS (“E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial,” “Gangs of New York”) will join the series in a recurring role as Jack’s (Anthony LaPaglia) evil nemesis, and the leader of a human trafficking group who the FBI team is pursuing.

GUEST STARS:

CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION Thursdays, 9:00-10:00 PM, ET/PT

JESSICA LUCAS (“The Covenant,” “The L Word”) is set to guest star in four episodes of CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION beginning Thursday, Oct. 11. She plays the role of Veronica Lake, aka “Ronnie,” a young, overzealous new CSI in training, who is extremely bright, albeit naïve. After graduating from one of the top criminalistics programs in the country, she was offered positions at numerous crime labs, but chose Vegas due to its increase in crime rates. Now that she’s entered the throws of solving real crimes, she’s about to find out that in searching for the perpetrator of a crime, she could easily become his next victim.

WITHOUT A TRACE Thursdays, 10:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT

JAMES MARSTERS (“Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” “Angel”) will guest star in a five episode arc beginning with the season premiere on Thursday, Sept. 27. He will play Grant Mars, a detective who helps Vivian (Marianne Jean-Baptiste) with an unsolved case.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT Mondays, 9:30-10:00 PM, ET/PT

Golden Globe nominee HEATHER LOCKLEAR (“Spin City”) will guest star in two episodes later this season as Barbara, the sister of Audrey (Megyn Price) who comes to town to visit. During her stay, Barbara announces that her marriage, which Audrey has always idealized, may be over. While Audrey has a difficult time dealing with the news, she is even more surprised to learn that her sister has agreed to go on a date with Russell (David Spade).

Fox’s “Nashville” had a few fun moments in it, but I’m just not sure what’s going on. Everyone seems to be looking for a career in country music, except the one dude whose dad rents/sells jets.

Looks like slimey Clint Moseley is just a guy trying to get lucky in front of the cameras. And by lucky, I mean get a little action with the ladies. And so far, he’s been pretty gosh darn lucky.

I’m wondering what former quarterback Terry Bradshaw thinks about his little girl Rachel getting played by this guy? I keep thinking there’s going to be a major tackle in his future.

And poor Matt Jenkins, who got dropped from his record label and now seems to be getting the boot from Mika Combs, who has a boyfriend back home in Kentucky. Yet, she seems awfully cozy with ol’ Clint.

So, right now I’m testing out embedding a non-You Tube clip here. Let’s see how it works. Should it be lower resolution? How long does it take to load?

The first one introduces the cast:

This one tells you what Nashville is all about…for them.

Help me out here, OK?

Here’s a tip for any young woman no matter if you are a celebrity or not: Please don’t flash the privates.

It’s bad enough when you decided to bare the bod for passing motorists on a whim, or go a little wacky on spring break, but when you take an actual photo of yourself standing in the all together, someone’s going to post it on the Internet.

And if you’re a celebrity, you can’t even trust your best pals.

But I applaud “High School Musical” star Vanessa Hudgens, because she didn’t lie about what she did. She owned up to her mistake, and we hope that counts for something when those holding the keys to the Mouse Kingdom decide if they still want to be in business with her.

In a statement to “Extra,” Vanessa says, “I want to apologize to my fans, whose support and trust means the world to me. I am embarrassed over this situation and regret having ever taken these photos. I am thankful for the support of my family and friends.”

Give her break. And to think, she was so happy at the 2007 Teen Choice Awards with her boyfriend on screen and in real life, Zac Efron. The phone-a-photo, we assume, was supposed to go for his eyes only:

As I speculated last week in my newspaper column, now that “Law & Order” is out of reruns, Fred Thompson has decided to declare himself a candidate for President of the United States.

And he announced it all on “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.” After all, as Fred told Jay, it’s a lot harder to get on the “Tonight Show” than it is to get on the ballot in the New Hampshire primary.

That Fred. He’s a hoot.

You can read the column at insidebayarea.com/tv

To see his Jay Leno apperance:

I’ll admit, this wasn’t the best summer for me. Right now, under the current regime, I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be able to write about TV, or if I’ll get to keep the column I’ve had for more than 14 years.

Boo-hoo, right? I mean, how many people get to say they watched TV for a living for more than a decade?

So it’s time to put the big girl panties on, and what better way to get through a difficult summer than to find out that maybe your pals at “The Office” had an even worst time.

Check it out:

We can hardly wait for the fall season to start. And who knows? If Ryan can become the boss, maybe I can too…