SueTube – Let’s talk TV with critic Susan Young

Few would have given Yau-Man Chan of Martinez much of a shot of getting past the first few days of “Survivor,” much less be poised to take it all on Sunday night.

After all, at 54 he’s one of the older competitors, works as the Director of Information Systems for the College of Chemistry at the University of California, Berkeley and he’s a table tennis champ.

Although impressive, none of that screams “Survivor.”

Yau-Man’s also originally from Malaysian Borneo and slipped right in
when it came to life in Fiji. He also used his considerable observation skills to slip out of more than one trap.

On Thursday, he played the game with a prowess that hadn’t been seen since fellow Bay Area “Survivor” champ Yul Kwon took it all in the last go-round.

Biding his time like a Triple Crown winner coming from behind the pack, he let others set the pace early on and did his best not to make enemies.

His cunning and playful side came out after he found the first Immunity Idol _ and then decided to make a fake idol and hide it for someone else to find.

But he really brought it on when he started winning challenges like the archery competition and proved he had some mad skills.

Yau-Man did what no other competitor has ever done on Thursday when he won a Ford truck valued at close to $50,000 and gave it to another competitor, Dreamz.

Earlier, Dreamz, a person who has been homeless for much of his life, revealed that he has never owned a car and would do anything to have one. It would change his life, he proclaimed.

So Yau-Man, out of the goodness of his heart _ and a plan to get further ahead in the game _ decided to give Dreamz the truck.

In return, he only asked that if Dreamz got immunity in the final four, he would give his immunity to Yau-Man. The Man decided that move would get him into the final three if his calculations were correct.

Then Yau-Man promptly sent himself to Exile Island _ another “Survivor” first _ so that he wouldn’t burn any bridges and he could find a clue to get another Immunity Idol for his pal Earl.

He succeeded in getting Earl an idol, but he didn’t count on Dreamz
attempting a coup to get him out of the game. Dreamz decided that he would have to get Yau-Man out before that final four so he wouldn’t have to go back on his word to hand over the immunity.

Might have been easier just to fail at the immunity challenges, but
that would have been too simple I guess.

Again, with seconds ticking away at Tribal Council, Yau-Man was feeling uneasy and decided to play his Immunity Idol.

It was a million dollar decision, because everyone in the tribe except Earl voting Yau-Man out. With his immunity played, the person he and Earl had chosen, Stacy, was voted out.

That leaves only five left standing for Sunday’s finale. Earl and Yau-Man have a solid alliance, but they have to get past Boo, Cassandra and Dreamz – all the people who had voted Yau-Man off.

Can Yau-Man win immunity again and make it into the final three, when it is up to the jury to decide? If so, he’s got a good chance to win it all because he’s played the game with honesty and integrity.

You go, Yau-Man.

Could it be? How could it happen?

All we know is that John Locke was last seen gasping for air after Ben shot him dead in the chest and sent him tumbling into a mass grave for all those dead Dharma guys.

Oh, and we also know through Eonline gossip goddess Kristin Veitch that Terry O’Quinn, who plays Locke, recently sold his home in Hawaii…not good.

We did learn a lot about Ben. Mom Emily (which was also Locke’s mom’s name) died in childbirth outside Portland. Dad Roger holds it against Ben. Dad’s also the guy who became dead Roger Work Man in the VW van that Hurley found a few episodes back.

After years of dad ignoring Ben’s birthday, on this particular birthday Dad decides it’s time to take the boy out for a beer in the jungle. Too late, daddy dearest. Ben kills daddy.

These father issues just don’t quit on this show.

And we finally got a glimpse of the mysterious Jacob, who is apparently one of the “whisperers” on the island. He whispers to Locke “Help Me” when Ben brings Locke to the old cabin where the mostly invisible Jacob lives.

Locke better hope Jacob can help him out. Otherwise it’s hasta la Locke.

And we’ve also seen that Ricard hasn’t aged at all in the decades he has known Ben.

Who are these “Others” anyway? We know they whacked the Dharma people, with the help of Ben. We know they steal women and children. And we know that they can’t reproduce.

And if you really want to get your head spinning, check out Jacob.

And why did Ben kill all the Dharma people, including, it would seem, his sweet little girlfriend. Or maybe she was one of the children carried off by “The Others.”

We don’t know much, but we know there’s going to be a big showdown soon. It’s going to set up quite a new season. Next week, we get a catch-up special where the “Lost” producers get us up to speed on anything we might have missed. Then just two more episodes before the mind-blasting finale.

Now talk amongst yourselves about the Wizard of Oz and Alice in Wonderland references.

All the smart money is on Jordin Sparks for the win in this season of “American Idol.”

Until May 22, it’s all just counting down to the inevitable.

Tonight, to no one’s surprise, Blake Lewis and LaKisha Jones were the last two standing in the eliminations. With Blake the lone boy left in the competition, it was obvious that LaKisha would get the boot tonight.

LaKisha looked worried from the start of the program _ a concern that played out in the end when it was announced that she was eliminated from the competition.

LaKisha started out the season strong, but kept dipping along the way while Jordin just keeps gaining ground.

Most of LaKisha’s problems were of her own doing.

She has consistantly chosen bad songs and each week can’t seem to stop from screaming out the lyrics.

Things started to crumble early on in the competition when guest singer Lulu couldn’t convince LaKisha that “Diamonds are Forever” was a bad way to go.

It just went down hill from there.

We suspect Blake is next on the chopping block, with a showdown between the always polished Melinda Doolittle and young Jordin, who just seems more like an “American Idol” kind of girl.

It’s official: The Gilmore Girls are no more.

Which means our beloved “Veronica Mars” probably won’t be around next season either, since “VM” consistantly falls below “GG” in the ratings.

FAREWELL TO THE GIRLS IN THE SERIES FINALE

In a joint statement from The CW and Warner Bros. Television, which produces the show, they write:

“Announcing the final season of ‘Gilmore Girls’ is truly a sad moment for everyone at The CW and Warner Bros. Television. This series helped define a network and created a fantastic, storybook world featuring some of television’s most memorable, lovable characters. We thank Amy Sherman-Palladino, Dan Palladino, Dave Rosenthal, the amazing cast led by Lauren Graham and Alexis Bledel, as well as the producers, writers and crew for giving us this delightful gem for the past seven years. We would also like to thank the critics and ‘Gilmore’ fans for their passionate support and promise to give this series the send-off it deserves.”

The series finale airs at 8 p.m. May 15 on the CW. We’re betting Luke and Lorelai get back together and Rory moves to San Francisco with Logan (have you noticed all the L people in this show?).

Of course, Rory will get a job at the Oakland Tribune...OK, she’ll probably opt for that other Bay Area newspaper. But wouldn’t it be sweet?

Actually, judging by the photo for an upcoming episode, she’s going to work at CNN.

“BON VOYAGE” Pictured (L-R) Christiane Amanpour as herself, Lauren Graham as Lorelai and Alexis Bledel as Rory star of THE CW series GILMORE GIRLS. Photo Credit: Bruce Birmelin / The CW ©2007 The CW Network

Ahoy, matey. We’ve got your scurvy crew right here.

Well, scurvy in the a-lotta-hotties kind of way.

CBS today introduced the 16 pirates who will compete in “Pirate Master,” a new reality-based series from “Survivor” creator – and newly wed to that divine Roma Downey – Mark Burnett.

CAST OF “PIRATE MASTER”

Australian actor Cameron Daddo will serve as host.

According to the press release, “Pirate Master” will send 16 modern-day pirates on a high seas adventure where they will live as buccaneers and travel around the Caribbean island of Dominica in search of hidden treasure that will total $1 million.

Over the course of 33 days, these pirates will live aboard a massive 179 foot, square-rigged barque which carries 12,500 square feet of sail.

Each week, the pirates will embark on extraordinary expeditions where they will decipher clues along the way in search of missing treasure. Gold coins — real money which the pirates may take with them beyond the show — will be awarded after each expedition, but only to some. The gold will play a key role as pirates strike deals with each other or plead for long-term security.

In addition to claiming the lion’s share of the week’s riches, one pirate will become the captain of the ship and will assign roles and chores to the remaining crew members, setting the tone for either law and order or betrayal and sabotage, which could lead to mutiny by the crew.

Each episode will conclude on the ship at Pirate’s Court, a lively gathering of public speaking and judgment where one individual will be eliminated and “cut adrift.” In the end, one will be the first to find the largest booty, worth $500,000, and claim the title of “Pirate Master.”

The show comes on at 8 p.m. Thursday, May 31 on CBS. Until then, check out the booty.

The pirates competing in PIRATE MASTER (in alphabetical order) are:

CHRISTA DeANGELO

29

Tamaqua, Pa.

Ex-Military

BEN FAGAN

23

Boston

Student/Musician

LOUIE FRASE

43

Fishing Creek, Md. (originally from Park Ridge, Ill.)

Marina Owner

KENDRA GUFFEY

38

Los Angeles (originally from Anchorage, Alaska)

Dive Master

JAY HATKOW

37

Detroit

Automotive Parts Salesman

AZMYTH KAMINSKI

26

Los Angeles (originally Mt. Vernon, Wash.)

Music Producer

CHERYL KOSEWICZ

35

Sparks, Nev. (originally from Grand Couler, Wash.)

District Attorney

JOHN LAKNESS

25

Carlisle, Mass.

Scientist/Chippendale Dancer

JOCELYN “JOY” MCELVEEN

21

West Columbia, S.C.

Receptionist

ELICIA “JUPITER” MENDOZA

30

Los Angeles (originally from Santa Rosa, Calif.)

Bartender

JOE DON “J.D.” NORTON

36

Ft. Wainwright, Alaska (originally from Scottsdale, Ariz.)

Smokejumper

NESSA NEMIR

29

Berkeley, Calif. (originally from Oakland, Calif.)

Make-Up Artist

CHRISTIAN OKOYE

45

Rancho Cucamonga, Calif. (originally from Enugu, Nigeria)

Former NFL Player

LAUREL SCHMIDT

21

Los Angeles (originally Detroit)

Glass Blower

ALEXIS SHUBIN

26

Laguna Beach, Calif. (originally from Fountain Valley, Calif.)

Fashion Publicist

SEAN TWOMEY

27

Venice, Calif. (originally from Pensacola, Fla.)

Bartender

It’s true. “The View” won’t have Rosie O’Donnell kicking up any more dust – and more importantly heating up the ratings.

ABC announced early today that the network was unable to come to a contractual agreement with “The View” co-host. As a result, her duties on the show will come to an end mid-June.

“They wanted me three years, I wanted one year, and it just didn’t work,” Rosie says on today’s show.

(ABC/HEIDI GUTMAN) ROSIE O`DONNELL,BARBARA WALTERS,OLYMPIA DUKAKIS,JOY BEHAR,ELISABETH HASSELBECK

“Going in we knew we would have an amazing year with her, and that anything beyond that would be gravy,” says Brian Frons, president of daytime programming for the Disney-ABC Television Group. “But we were willing to take the chance because we understood what a coup it was to entice Ro back to daytime television. So here we are a year later, and while we’ve tried to come to terms on a deal that would extend her co-hosting duties on ‘The View,’ we find ourselves unable to agree on some key elements.”

Rosie pumped up the profile of the daytime show with her ongoing feud with Donald Trump, her politically incorrect comments and her attacks on those she felt were intolerant of the rights of others.

Barbara Walters, creator and co-executive producer of “The View,” said in a statement that she was the one to coax the high voltage Rosie into taking a seat on “The View.”

“She has given the program new vigor, new excitement and wonderful hours of television. I can only be grateful to her for this year,” Barbara says. “I am very sad that ABC Daytime could not reach an agreement with her for a second year.”

As for Rosie, she says in a release sent out by ABC that it has been an amazing experience and one she wouldn’t have traded for the world.

“Working with Barbara, Joy and Elisabeth has been one of the highlights of my career, but my needs for the future just didn’t dovetail with what ABC was able to offer me.

To all the viewers out there, I just want to say ‘thank you’ for opening up your hearts and your homes to me this past year. But you can always find me at rosie.com. Here’s hoping there’s more confetti for all of us going forward.”

(ABC/HEIDI GUTMAN) ROSIE O`DONNELL,JOHN LITHGOW

Since the departure was made on friendly terms, ABC hopes to entice Rosie back next year to take part in a series of one-hour specials or guest host once in a while.

There are no current plans to announce a new co-host.

Sanjaya says he’s looking into getting a bodyguard.

Can he really be that popular? Or that deluded?

SANJAYA AND LAKISHA IN BOTTOM 2

The kid came across as a naive young man who says he got his GED as a sophomore and thinks of his time on “American Idol” as his “junior and senior year in high school.”

“It was my mom’s idea for me to get my GED,” Sanjaya says in a teleconference with journalists today. “ I got into a little bit of trouble in school and didn’t do my homework. It was a horrible habit that I had. I just wanted to move on and focus on my music.”

And he says that he thinks that Howard Stern and Web sites like votefortheworst had little impact on him.

“I don’t think (they) had enough people voting for me to make a dent in anything,” Sanjaya says. “The reason why I’m here is solely because of the support from my fans.”

So why did he get the boot this week?

“Honestly, I’m not a country singer and I didn’t have enough really strong performances for people to forgive me,” Sanjaya says. “LaKisha had enough strong performances to get her through. So that’s what got me this week.”

Sanjaya, whose father is a construction worker, says he still wants to go to college at the Berklee School of Music some day, but right now he feels is the time to focus on his career and “ `American Idol’ was a great way to do that.”

The 17-year-old says the only time he felt he was in over his head was during Hollywood week.

“That was completely intense. I had my sister there and she really supported me,” Sanjaya says. “I just wanted to get past that.”

He says it was surreal for him to become a cultural phenomenon. And he still isn’t sure what to make of it.

“You just don’t have the slightest idea of the capacity of this show and the impact of this show,” he says. “Once in a while, you get inklings.”

“I had no idea,” he says. “It seems kind of unnatural. I’m just a guy from Federal Way. It’s crazy.”

He says he liked the skit “Saturday Night Live” did on him, and believes you have to be able to laugh at yourself.

Which brings us, of course, to Simon Cowell.

“I think he had gotten to a point where I hadn’t fulfilled the potential (he thought I had in the beginning) and didn’t think I belonged there, which is OK,” Sanjaya says.

Sanjaya says he’s looking forward to being part of the season finale and to go on tour. After that, he’ll be looking at opportunities in acting, modeling and perhaps even Broadway.

Did Simon Crowell really roll his eyes when Chris Richardson offered a heartfelt comment about the tragedy at Virginia Tech?

Simon’s telling anyone who will listen that he was horrified to see himself on TV having that reaction.

TMZ reported this morning that Simon says “I couldn’t hear what Chris had said. I was talking to Paula. My reaction (rolling his eyes) was to what he had said previously, that singing nasally is a form of singing.”

Do we believe Simon?

Actually, he probably wasn’t paying attention to what Chris was saying, because Simon’s notorious rude when it comes to the post comments comments by the contestants.

He’s had his say and then he tends to jabber with the other judges while Ryan Seacrest talks to the singers.

But that hasty little comment Simon made later in the program was absolutely damage control. He offered up his own sympathies to the families which sounded rushed and, to use terms Simon has used on the contestants, I just didn’t feel it.

click here for video of Simon’s eye-roll and his own condolence to the Virginia Tech families.

The only surprise on tonight’s “America’s Next Top Model” was that Tyra finally let Whitney go.

WHITNEY

Is it the fact that without Whit, Tyra’s obviously the go-to plus size model on the show?

Look, we’re not against women carrying a few pounds, since we obviously have had ample exercise lifting the fork from the plate to our own mouth, but this IS a show about fashion and modeling.

It’s all about looks, baby.

Right now I’m concerned about Jaslene. She started out so strong, but as the judges noted tonight, her pictures just get weaker and weaker.

On the other hand, Natasha keeps getting stronger. That little Russian gets on my nerves, but I have to admit her pictures get more fierce each week. But my favorite is still Brittany, because she actually looks like a model to me.

And she showed up those creepy twins tonight. I never thought the twins were all that, but seeing them fade in the picture with Brittany justified those feelings.

Next girl out has got to be Jael.

Hey, where would those singers be without the people who write the songs?

Now, “American Idol” producer Simon Fuller is asking for potential hit makers to join the American Idol Songwriter competition, giving Idol fans their first chance to write the next American Idol’s hit single.

Additional details and online submissions, which open today, can be found at www.americanidol.com

Fuller and his 19 Entertainment A&R staff will select the initial Top 20 songs from all the entries. Beginning May 2, fans will then be able to go online, listen to and vote for their favorite songs.

The song chosen by the nation will then be performed live in front of millions of viewers on the season’s finale.

But that is only the beginning.

The song will be recorded and released by this year’s American Idol. The winning songwriter will receive a music publishing deal with 19 Entertainment; a cash advance on royalties; and the thrill of watching their song belted out by “American Idol” finalists on the show’s final episodes.

Key Dates for American Idol Songwriter Competition

April 4 – Launch contestant submission phase on

April 17 – Submission phase ends

May 2 – Online voting commences

May 8 – Online voting closes

May 22 – The songwriting winner announced on American Idol finale